"Untitled"
we gaze at crimson skies
beneath the chilling stillness
as darkness descends,
seeping
silently into the cracks
the earth crumbles
beneath the weight of emptiness
and everything slowly fades away
quietly
deteriorating
rotting into oblivion
but yet, we stand amidst the desolation,
awash in effulgent light
as you scream
in ecstasy
and i fall to my knees
to deplore the angelic death
intoxicated with its splendor,
we tremble in the
arms of sorrow
and lethargically waste away
Red Tears
I drink water and her blood is what i taste.
I look in the mirror and i see her
face.
I dream and see her crying red tears,
I see her trying to stab away her fears.
The red fills the tub
she lays in,
Its happened before but i see it all again.
I hear her voice when im on the phone,
I see her when im
alone at home.
Red tears were on her face when she cried,
Red tears covered her body when she died.
" untitled"
>I used to love this world.
>It always was in my youth,
>a happy
place to flee to.
>The people cared for one another,
>needed each other to survive.
>That concept has
died.
>People don't care anymore,
>they step on each other,
>just so they can make it to the top.
>
>And as my youth faded,
>hell seemed to rise.
>It seemed to devour all that i held dear,
>consuming
with each bite,
>bits of my life.
>Family issues worsened,
>people to help were called,
>they
seemed to be the only ones who cared.
>
>As years went on I forgot,
>the many memories of my past,
>hiding
them in the darkest place of my mind.
>Wondering if it was I,
>I used to cry.
>Thinking I was nothing,
>useless to this earth,
>always seeing those who were so much,
>so precious to everyone everywhere.
>A
darkend veil I used to keep,
>always covering from sight,
>all the things I feared to meet.
>But now
my youth has gone away,
>and I no longer see the good,
>the happy, the love.
>
>A riot has broken,
>proven my fear,
>brought to life the very thing that I despair.
>And as a child I used to love this
world,
>but now I see it as it truely is,
>a waste for time,
>a waste for life to only die in the end.
>For as I sit about to die,
>I see I did not love this world,
>rather hated it before the day I was born.
"The forgotten"
Screaming from deep inside, no foundation to hold.
Life scrambles
about, with no salvation seekable.
Breathing deeply, they stare, they watch,
yet still life does no notice.
Why?
Why does life pass so quickly,
No great accomplishments are made,
unspeakable memories crowd them,
heartache and
sorrow,
unwant and pain.
They sit, they stare,
the cold swallows them,
the frost bites at them,
yet life takes
no interest.
Life leaves them; deserts them,
leaving them so many cares,
so many wonders,
but still no speck of
a significant life.
-s
"forsaken"
Look at her,
her face drips blood,
pouring tears of acid rain.
Heartache
all among the ruins,
lost in a world of confusion,
minds all crazed and broken parted,
faces grey and rotting corpses.
Sitting
lost among the living,
watching, waiting, needing something.
Fire from hell itself,
never ending to be out.
Fear
gripped faces of the future,
longing to feel the warmth,
look around the world of living,
wonder why there's nothing
there.
People round the world are calling,
walking into danger's core.
Laughter gone and submersed,
screams anger
from inside,
seize the darkness,
come down under.
Watch the moments grow stronger,
looking down i see your pain,
anger
deep in core of man,
it wishes to be free to wander,
longing for something to hold.
Watch the clock as it ticks by,
death
is coming in with every breath,
wait a minute, stop the yelling,
voices start to fade and wander,
calling out as
they go by.
People wishing, people dreaming,
saying prayers no one hears.
looking up they see the light,
going
down the pain grows stronger.
For one moment it seems right,
for one second they can't wait.
Screaming as they go
down under,
pain is coming, they can feel.
Watching, waiting and wondering,
looking for something to grasp.
Asking
when will it be over,
getting nothing in return.
-s
"Deadly poison"
deadly poison,
oh how it wrecks,
billowing in
from beneath the cracks,
filling my lungs with revenge,
taking it out on me til the end.
Knowing my crime it digs
even deeper,
stoping my heart from beating forever.
Closing my lungs
so i take my last breath.
Having done the
worst,
it wants me to see,
that my choice brought only pain,
the pain it now brings.
Deadly poison i breathe in
As
i start to choke,
losing my life in a box full of smoke.
sitting alone, hands behind back,
Deadly poison being pumped
in,
for what they call my execution.
-s
you don't know me,
no one does,
you all have this fantasy about
what and who you think I
am,
well i'm not that person.
outside i put on this fake smile,
this fake personality,
it's not me,
it never
will be.
inside i'm dying,
breaking down,
at night when no one hears,
i lie in bed and cry.
why do i feel like
this?
i don't know.
i try to explain how i feel,
but you don't understand.
you don't know me.
no one does.
Why must everyone be so perfect?
So skinny and so pretty, so stereotyped
And so FAKE
Why
must everyone have to have the perfect identity
and figure to be beautiful?
Why does this world have this one image
we should all be?
Sheep aren't beautiful
Image hunters aren't pretty
People who are exactly the same aren't interesting
Beautiful
people are people who embrace who they really are
and can see beyond looks
Peoples image comes from their heart - from
the truth
And interesting people are individuals with real things
to say and beliefs of their own.
"If You See What You See"
If you see what you see
its just an evil dream,
a dream that
wont set me free,
If you see what you see
dont worry its just me
trying to escape this
evil dream that i see
If you see what you see
help me get me out of
this scary scary Dream.
By:Stephanie T.
"Hard Times"
Blue and Green
children scream,
crying out to
be set free,
No one knows
how hard it is,
to be trapped in a
place like this
Its hard to sleep,hard to eat
its hard to keep myself
from killing me
Hard to love,hard to
care,
no on knows
its hard to bare.
By:Stephanie T.
"Dying for You"
I scream out for
the love of my life,
as he walks into the
cold dark
night,
While he left me
there in my knees,
begging him please
to stay with me for
eternity,
I
lay on the florr
crying tears of blood,
cutting my self as if
im not one,
Waiting for my dark
handsome prince
to come take my hand
and save me,from killing
me,
And to take me out of this
Dark Hell i feel.
By:Stephanie T.
"my new attitude"
today is the day when i started to pray
and i ask god to help me be ok,
my life for so long has been very strange
so today i decided i needed a change,
the Dr. i saw told me that i will soon die
that is when i knew i was living a lie,
i was so determined that this was fate
i knew at this very moment it wasn't to late
i was going
to get healthy and lose this weight,
my life is very important to me
thats when i looked at myself and began to see,
the Dr. was right when he said i would soon die
he said my friend this is no lie,
i have kids and a husband to think about
thats when i realized there wasn't a doubt
this
is what life is all about,
i need to be around for my family and love
and cherish them like i should
at this point in
my life i knew i could,
my friends tell me all the time
christine you are someone special and so kind,
so next time when i start feeling sad
i will take a good look at myself and see what i do have,
i sometimes wonder what would i do
to myself when im feeling sad and blue,
kids,family and friends are all i have
so my life without these people would be so bad,
so next time when something doesn't feel quite right
i will look around and thank god for making
everything
in my life so beautiful and bright.....
signed
"new begining"
"sadden eyes"
dear mom why did you have yo leave me
why did you have to die,
i sit around and begin to cry
i don't think it was fair
that you had to die but my biggest
question
is w h y? ,
i miss you so much
my body hurts to the touch,
i want so badly to come and see you mom but,
i am not sure how to get this done,
my hubby ask me whats the matter,
when he see's me sitting here crying,
i told him i want to be with my mom,
he looked at me with such alarm,
he thinks im crazy and have lost my mind,
he does not know that feel like im lost in time,
well what i say about all that is
i am under alot of pain and stress
so people who don't know
me
im trying my best,
i lost the most important person in my life
and people are always giving me stupid advice,
people don't quite understand how
losing a loved one is forever gone
they think i should just
carry on,
it is not that easy for me to be ok
but i know i will be with my mom someday,
it may be sooner than people think
i could be gone in just a blink...
"i
love you mom"
your loving daughter christina
"Gift Of Death"
I quickly tire of hearing you scream,
as I glare at you my eyes beam.
You
do not know but soon will be dead
and will regret every word you said.
As I stab you the knife I twist,
to feel the
death I long have mist.
This gift I give you I hand you with pleasure,
and this memory I will forever treasure.
"Inner Demons"
These voices in my head just wont go away.
Everytime I ask them to leave ,they
stay.
I dont know how much more I can take,
I wish they would materialize to be pierced with a stake.
Having these
voices isn't very mundane,
but my mind will forever be their domain.
Layers of Myself
Let me out
Set me free
I need to be set free
I'm burning up inside from crying about nothing.
Let me out Let me out Let me out Let me out Let me out.
Let me fly
Let my wings expand
Let my feathers
fly away into the sunset
Let me free out of this cage, it is too small.
Take me away
Take me away from
this place
Take me away from him
Take me home with you I need out of this place
It is to complicated and scary.
Leave
me alone
Just let me free for a day or two
I need time to figure out who are my friends and who aren't.
Just let
me out, set me free, let me fly
I'm a bird that needs to migrate south, so let me free let me go I'll be back
at summer.
I promise I will be back in time for hot summer days to go jump the ice cold pool.
I'm a polar bear just
let me sleep my anger off during the winter.
I promise I will be back for those hot ball games with sunflower seeds.
I
promise I will love you for ever, just give me some time, give me some space to think.
I FEEL U IN THE DEPTHS OF MY SOUL
U FUFILL MY LIFE
U HAVE THE VOICE OF A GOD
I TRUST IN U B CAUSE UR ALL I HAVE LEFT
U MAKE THE RULZ AND I FOLLOW
U R THE VOICE THAT LEADS ME
U R MY EYES
U R IN MY SOUL
U R MY MIND
AS OF TODAY U R ME
AND NO LONGER WILL FIGHT U
BUT I WILL WORSHIP U
"A woman borne of blackest heart
her soul in midnight seldom sleeps
I felt her coldness from
the start
into my dreams her shadow creeps
She sings to me a wicked song
of cloudless nights with quarter moon
the winter winds blew hard
and long
but never clear away the gloom
Her changing shape does terrify
and I cant help but want to run
on ravens wings while on the
fly
the demons hunt till morning comes
From her eyes a white hot light
each tear a drop of molten steele
her venom spat in brilliant
bright
so done with sweet demonic zeal
Blessed by he of hellish rank
unholy love,they two were cursed
with open wounds that truly
stank
the virgin mother would not nurse
Why am I the chosen one
in fear of being unredeemed
devoured by the fallen son
who showed
no mercy as I screamed
With crimson ink on tattered page
in blood thy name is written down
my soul condemned with
savage rage
by queen of night in thorny crown".Words Ken Amaro..
"silence"
flowers and tainted blood
mixed
with suppressed love
makes me feel used
makes me feel abused
i scream out in the darken light
to make this right
it
eats away causing decay
i try to run
but i'm trapped in chains
it's all the same
make it go away
there's only
1 way out now
the knife hugs my throat
embracing for the slide
the blood skips down
and i start to fade
it's
turning black
there's no turning back
this is what i wanted
silence death's reward.
the bleeding heart
"sickness of the heart"
baffle me
ryming riddles in the dark
pain needs
slipping
demons staining mark
shattered
lies
forgotten tearing me apart
no hope
hating
no blessed new start
false tears
unknown
death's killing
dart
jades soul
alone
sickness of the heart
the bleeding heart
pain
i remember
the days
we had to sneek to see each other
but now its no bother
you came to me
and wouldn't let me be
i'm
all alone there's noone here
you use me
and take away my fear
you rip my shirt
and i start to cry
but my tears
have gone dry
you rip my pants
i get scared
it was just a dare
i'm in pain
you don't care
as long as you
are pleased
i'm shouting in pain
you push harder
and then you get tired
so you stop
i can't cry
my tears
are dry
i feel hate cause all you do is rape
unwanted
I don't care
flames
are burning
satin's returnig
fire blares
still there's noone who cares
it's like hell on earth
it's like satin's
rebirth
open your eyes
can't you see the cloudy skys?
no light shines through
i don't know what to do
you just
don't care
so i just sit in stare
i don't know where i have fallen to
but i still call out to you
it's all so
confusing
your words seem so abusing
i try not to care
cause i know you wanna be there
unwanted
MISTY
My name is Misty
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
Made my daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can'tspeak at all
I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long.
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks arent home
When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight.
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall
I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry
He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor
My name is Misty
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me.
~SOURCE UNKNOWN IF KNOWN PLEASE CONTACT ME~
IN DEATH I HAUNT YOU
I walked through the ashes
as this is where you left me
for dead.
Setting ablaze our souls
You
poured the fuel
upon my sleeping head.
I screamed as I awoke
feeling my flesh burn
from outside to within.
I
watched you laughing at me
watching
with your evil
little grin.
I fell to the ground
as you walked through
that door
Leaving me in my agony
as you left me
burning
like never before.
My flesh turned to ashes
my bones
turned to dust
Only wanting me for
selfish uses
I was a victim
of your evil lust.
BUt my soul lives on
through
shadows
in the corner of your eye
Always watch your back
because I am never far behind
Can you feel the fear
as
I stroke the back of your neck
My ghost will haunt you forever
Until it is your time
when it is your burning death.
I
hide in your shadows
the darkness in your room
forever to bring your nightmares
turn your bright days
darknened
gloom.
You left me here in ashes
you left me here to DIE
For now I walk in silence
amongst the shadows
in your
eyes.
I will always
be
watching you
now
my love
Poetry From The Starlite Cafe
IN DEATH I HAUNT YOU
Subject: The Story Behind "The Room"
17-year-old Brian Moore had only a short time to write something for the
Fellowship of Christian
Athletes meeting. It was his turn to lead the
discussion so he sat down and wrote.
He showed the essay, titled "The Room" to his mother, Beth, before he
headed out the door.
"I wowed 'em." he later told his father, Bruce. "It's a killer, It's
the bomb. It's
the best thing I ever wrote." It also was the last.
Brian's parents had forgotten about the essay when a cousin
found it
while cleaning out the teenager's locker at Teary Valley High School.
Brian had been dead only hours, but his
parents desperately wanted every
piece of his life near them -- the crepe paper that had adorned his locker
during his
senior football season, notes from classmates and teachers, his
homework.
Only two months before, he had handwritten the essay about encountering
Jesus in a file room full
of cards detailing every moment of the teen's
life. But it was only after Brian's death that Beth and Bruce
Moore
realized that their son had described his view of heaven.
"It makes such an impact that people want to share it. You feel like you
are there." Mr.
Moore said.
Brian Moore died May 27, 1997, -- the day after Memorial Day
He was driving home from a friend's house when his car went off
Bulen-PierceRoad in Pickaway
County and struck a utility pole. He emerged
from the wreck unharmed but stepped on a downed power line and
was
electrocuted.
Brian seemed to excel at everything he did. He was an honor student.
He told his parents
he loved them "a hundred times a day", Mrs. Moore
said.
He was a star wide receiver for the Teary's Valley Football team and had
earned a four-year
scholarship to Capital University in Columbus
because of his athletic and academic abilities.
He took it upon himself to learn how to help a fellow student who used a
wheelchair at school.
During one homecoming ceremony, Brian walked on
his tiptoes so that the girl he was escorting wouldn't be embarrassed
about
being taller than him.
He adored his kid brother, Bruce, now 14. He often escorted his
grandmother, Evelyn
Moore, who lives in Columbus, to church. "I always
called him the "deep thinker", Evelyn said of her eldest
grandson.
Two years after his death, his family still struggles to understand why
Brian was taken
from them. They find comfort at the cemetery where
Brian is buried, just a few blocks from their home.
They visit daily. A
candle and dozens of silk and real flowers keep vigil over the gravesite.
The Moore's framed a copy of Brian's essay and hung it among the family
portraits in the living
room. "I think God used him to make a point.
I think we were meant to find it and make something out of it,
" Mrs.
Moore said of the essay. She and her husband want to share their son's
vision of life after death.
"I'm happy for Brian. I know he's in heaven.
I know I'll see him again someday." Mrs. Moore said. "It
just hurts so
bad now."
"The Room"
In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room.
There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall covered
with small index card files.
They were like the ones in libraries that list
titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which
stretched
from floor to ceiling and seemingly endless in either direction,
had very different headings.
As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one
that read "Girls
I have liked." I opened it and began flipping through
the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to
realize that I recognized the
names written on each one. And then without being told, I knew exactly
where
I was.
This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my
life. Here
were written the actions of my every moment, big and small,
in a detail my memory couldn't match.
A sense of wonder
and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me
as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content.
Some
brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so
intense that I would look over my shoulder
to see if anyone was watching.
A file named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I have
betrayed."
The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird. "Books I
Have Read,"
"Lies I Have Told," "Comfort I have Given," "Jokes I Have
Laughed at." Some were almost
hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've
yelled at my brothers."
Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done in My Anger" "Things
I
Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents." I never ceased to be
surprised by the contents.
Often there were many more cards than I expected. Sometimes fewer than
I hoped.
I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived.
Could it be possible that I had the time in my years to write each of
these thousands or
even millions of cards?
But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own
handwriting. Each signed
with my signature.
When I pulled out the file marked "Songs I have listened to," I
realized the
files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed
tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't
found the end of the
file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of musicbut more by
the vast time
I knew that file represented.
When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts," I felt a chill run
through my body.
I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test
its size, and drew out a card. I shuddered at
its detailed content. I
felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded. An almost animal
rage
broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: "No one must ever see
these cards!
No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!" In insane
frenzy
I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty
it and burn the cards.
But as I took it at one end and began pounding it
on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card.
I became desperate
and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as
steel when I tried to tear it. Defeated and utterly
helpless, I returned
the file to its slot.
Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying
sigh.
And then I saw it.
The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel With." The handle was
brighter than
those around it, newer, almost unused. I pulled on its
handle and a small box not more than three
inches long fell into my
hands.
I could count the cards it contained on one hand. And then the tears
came.
I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt. They started in my
stomach
and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of
shame, from the overwhelming shame of it
all.
The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must
ever, ever know
of this room. I must lock it up and hide the key. But
then as I pushed away the tears, I saw Him.
No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus. I watched
helplessly
as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't
bear to watch His response. And in
the moments I could bring myself to
look at His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own. He seemed to
intuitively
go to the worst boxes. Why did He have to read every one?
Finally He turned and looked at me from across the
room. He looked at me
with pity in His eyes.
But this was a pity that didn't anger me. I dropped my head, covered
my face
with my hands and began to cry again.
He walked over and put His arm around me. He could have said so many
things.
But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me. Then He got
up and walked back to the wall of files.
Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, one by one,
began to sign
His name over mine on each card. "No!" I shouted rushing
to Him.
All I could find to say was
"No, no, " as I pulled the card from Him. His name
shouldn't be on
these cards.
But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, so alive. The
name
of Jesus covered mine.
It was written with His blood.
He gently took the card back. He smiled a sad smile and began to sign
the cards.
I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly,
but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last
file and walk back
to my side.
He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, "It is finished." I stood
up, and
He led me out of the room.
~SOURCE UNKNOWN~
